Day 44

I did the New York Times crossword puzzle today for the first time in months. I made breakfast for my family. I made more face masks, for my kids and for a friend and for a few family members. I read the Book Review and a few articles in the Times magazine.

That’s about it.

From 8 a.m. until 8 p .m., that’s what I accomplished.

I also spent way too much time scrolling through phone: News apps, Instagram, more news, occasionally email.

Mostly, though, today I felt itchy. It was supposed to rain, and then it didn’t really, not until after noon. I could have gone for a walk, but I didn’t because I kept expecting rain. As a result I felt unfocused, slightly anxious and like I was suffering from restless leg syndrome all day. I found myself sighing and moaning a lot. Boredom. Frustration. Despair. Complete lack of control over the situation.

This was not the best Sunday ever.

Totals are much the same as yesterday, only because I really rounded up. But we did notice tonight, while watching CNN, that Massachusetts has nearly 10,000 more recorded cases than California. More than 54,000 in Massachusetts now.

2.99 million cases worldwide. 206,000 deaths. 987,000 cases in the U.S. 55,000 U.S. deaths.

Today my son asked me if I thought we could go on a family vacation next summer. Yes, I said. Yes. And we will have some colleges to go see, too. We’ll have some catching up to do. Next summer. Maybe next spring, even? Later than we had planned, but we will make it work.

He is paying attention. Trying to make sense of it all. To know more about what to expect. He was pleased with the mask I made him.

My daughters are cleaning out their room. They have been working through and weeding out areas as the weeks have gone by. The bins under their beds. The closet. Desk. Collection of stuffies. Clothes that are too small. Game shelf. Bookshelves, organized alphabetically by author. Today they tackled the art shelves. I asked if they had any coloring books for me. I need something to do. i’m about done making masks. Time to move on to another activity.

Today the kids seemed to be handling things much better than I was.

Tomorrow: Monday. Back to work. Then a board meeting. More rain in the forecast. And more cases and totals to record at the end of the day. Turning on the news and watching the ticker at the bottom of the screen indicate cases per county, per state, is a surreal and disarming experience, and one that we already are accustomed to. This is not the reality I want to be recording.

Stay safe, everyone.